Wear These Giant Lobster Claws To Begin Your New Life As A Semi-Crustacean

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If you’re going to be a supervillain bent on unleashing hell into the world, you’ll need some kind of deformity to make you nefarious and scary. Like a giant head, armored skin, or an oversized hand that can slap people with shovel-sized coverage. If you’ve decided to be a supervillain, but were unlucky enough to be born with absolutely perfect features, maybe you can just conduct your evil deeds wearing these Giant Lobster Claws, instead.

A pair of crustaceous appendages, it lets you terrorize the metropolis with a pair of man-sized claws, ready to snap at any superhero or innocent civilian in your way. It looks severely realistic, too, so people will totally think you belong in a freak carnival, leaving no doubt in your stature as an abominable antagonist.

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The Giant Lobster Claws are made from latex, so you can keep some degree of control with the way they move. Each one comes with thumb holes, just in case you need those opposable thumbs to defend yourself from a superhero bent on putting an end to your reign of terror. It measures 14.5 inches long, so it should support most adult hands in a comfortable manner. Since wearing the claw will absolutely hinder any ability to use your fingers, we highly recommend hiring a driver to operate your automobile, bringing a couple of henchmen to wield your weapons, and activating Siri on your iPhone, so you can respond to texts from arms dealers, mercenaries, and other shady characters without having to rely on the touch controls.

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Want one? The Giant Lobster Claws are priced at £24.99.

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