You never told anyone about it, but your lifelong dream has always been to become a goofy police officer. You know, like the guys in Reno 911, any dude who plays a cop opposite Jackie Chan in a Hollywood movie, and Paul Blart (wait, he's a cop, right?). Too bad you were born with too much steez -- you just breeze through everything with more collected calm than James Bond and George Clooney combined. Well, this might help you craft that goofy persona you've always desired: the Police Officer's Electric Chariot.
According to the product page, this is an actual personal transporter used by police and military personnel on patrols. Not mall cops, not rent-a-cops in your gated community and not circus clowns -- real police. So whether you're a seasoned detective or a dashing young man entering the police academy, this is exactly what you need to add a little eccentricity to your otherwise uptown persona.
The Police Officer's Electric Chariot is a three-wheeled personal transport vehicle measuring 57 x 36.75 x 53.3 inches (l x w x h). It's driven standing similar to a Segway, with both the throttle and the brakes easily accessible from the handlebars. An onboard DC motor powers the vehicle, pushing it to speeds of up to 20 mph, while you stand on a platform measuring 2.5 square feet. Features include front-wheel drive, a 10:1 gear ratio that lets it climb inclines up to 22 degrees, a zero-degree turning radius that lets riders turn without the need to make room, and a full set of LED lights.
Classified as a motorized bicycle, you should be able to ride it without any special permits (unless there are special laws in your area, of course). To help you drive more efficiently, it comes with an LCD panel that shows speed and battery information.
Hammacher Schlemmer has the Police Officer's Electric Chariot available now, priced at $8,900.