Few things in life are more awesome than being a spoiled kid with exorbitantly rich parents. While the rest of us had to make do with playhouses no more classier than the dog house you built in workshop class in high school, they get to enjoy veritable mansions of tomfoolery like this Pirate Ship Playhouse.
Yes, it’s a children’s playhouse styled to look like a weather-beaten pirate ship right out of an imaginative boy’s swashbuckling fantasies. Sure, it can’t exactly sail away into the horizon in search of a mysterious island that only exists in an obscure treasure map, but for backyard pirate-play with a crew of your best pals, we can’t imagine anything better.
The Pirate Ship Playhouse measures 26 x 11 x 23 feet (l x w x h), making for one huge structure to conduct after-school shenanigans in. Clad in cedar and redwood exterior, the marooned ship comes with all the requisite pirate details, including a bowsprit with a cutlass-bearing skeleton, crossbone window panes, and cannonball holes, complete with a crow’s nest holding Calico Jack Rackam’s Jolly Roger flag. All interior areas are framed in Douglas fir, with everything finished in weather-resistant paint.
The ship can be entered from a ladder inside a hollowed-out tree trunk that leads to a secret trap door, an open staircase, and a climbing net, with the ship’s bow, castle and balcony all serving as playing areas. For quickly abandoning ship when your pirate crew gets overwhelmed, it comes with a corkscrew tunnel slide and a fireman’s pole. Oh yeah. the whole thing weighs 2,000 pounds, so neighborhood pirates aren’t likely to be able to steal it away from your backyard with ease.
Hammacher Schlemmer has the Pirate Ship Playhouse available, priced at $27,000.