Ain’t nothing like the stink of last night’s drinking binge oozing out of your every pore. Not only do people stay away from you in the subway, no one bothers to come near you at work. That’s like a misanthrope’s wet dream and you can enjoy it everyday by using Dogfish Head Beer Soap, a cleansing bar made from beer, ground hops and barley.
Not just any beer, mind you. It uses the company’s signature 90-minute India Pale Ale (IPA), a beverage once hailed by Esquire magazine as “perhaps the best IPA in America.” That way, you won’t just smell like you’re drenched in beer – you’ll be tingling olfactory senses with a highly-alcoholic and critically-acclaimed brew.
Granted, the Dogfish Head Beer Soap adds a few other ingredients to make sure you clean up good. The sudsy bar comes with palm, coconut, rice bran and olive oils, as well essential oils of lavender, rosemary and fir, after all. We’re not sure how much those things affect the smell, but I’m hoping they only make it more offensive.
Why not just drink beer every night if you want to reek of it? Because you need to literally drink tons of the stuff to ensure a nasty smell. Not only does that many beers cost a pretty penny on daily basis, it wreaks havoc on your system – you feel boated, you want to throw up constantly and you may even get a nasty migraine for all your troubles. If you’re only looking to drive people away from your face, that’s not exactly the most efficient way of getting it. Bathing in the smell, on the other hand, should seal the deal nicely.
Available in 3.5oz bars, the Dogfish Head Beer Soap currently retails for $5 apiece.