When there are too many people at a party, hoarding that beer may be the only way to go. There’s no better contraption to help you pull that off than the Portable Tap Dispenser, a wearable container with all the amenities every beer drinker is going to need.
Designed to be carried like a backpack, the rig comes with a large cylindrical container, a hose-connected dispenser and a hanging pouch for cups (in case you’d like to share). You can use it to distribute draft around the party, keep a supply for yourself for the whole night or even fill up before going home (hey, free beer shouldn’t go to waste).
There are no specs for the container’s size, though I reckon it can fit in four liters or more of brew, just from looking at the pictures. It slots into a backpack-style strap that should keep it securely behind you. Everything’s made of plastic, however, so that could spell trouble after you’ve kept your beer there for a while. Hopefully, you’ll be drunk enough to even bother noticing the flat taste, so it’s all good.
Do note that the Portable Tap Dispenser comes with its own perils. First, anyone that hoards beer is a douchebag who deserves to get his ass kicked. Second, we’ll call you “Waiter” all night if you go around with a crate of beer hanging on you. Third, everyone thinks you look like an idiot with a giant tube on your back – no matter how drunk they all get.
The Portable Tap Dispenser is now ready to serve beer-guzzling party-animals like you for a $35 price.